§ 1. I have many things to say to fathers and mothers on behalf of their sons, against a useless love harmful to the state. But I fear that they will not receive them; therefore I shall refer the cause to the magistrates, for it is their duty to watch lest a criminal citizen be educated for the state. For if he turns out a drunkard, spendthrift, adulterer, turbulent man, robber, or slanderer, he will also be a traitor to his fatherland, if he is able. I propose certain things generally, not as though unknown, but because I desire that they be brought into practice; for they have now long been neglected.
§ 2. The first precept is necessary and difficult: that the life of father and mother, brothers and kinsmen, be the discipline of the new Roman citizen. He will truly learn what he has seen in his father. He thinks first of all that what he sees his father doing is permissible. It is a welcome thing that you have given a citizen to the fatherland and the people, if you make him fit for the fatherland. You will not do so if by your example you show him how to follow vices. The force of example is great toward all,
but it is entire in teaching the tender: they cannot judge; what they see, they follow. The eagle leads its young out to hunt; the younger dog learns from the older to watch for the beast; the young bull submits its neck to the yoke after first accompanying an ox. Thus the son thinks that the occupation in which he sees his father engaged is a dignity, not a labor. O happy young man, who have above all a man to imitate whom nature willed you to resemble most closely! Pliny, book 8, Epistle 13. A son’s great happiness is not a rich or powerful father, but a good one. Sometimes Absalom is born from David, Manasseh from Hezekiah, Jehoahaz from Josiah; and conversely bad sons are born from good men, and the sons of heroes are banes. But as it is easy for descendants to degenerate from paternal virtue, so it is exceedingly rare for those who have had the first lessons of their fathers’ crimes to turn out upright. Such men you may rightly call sons of God, because by virtue they have overcome nature.
§ 3. The second precept tends to the same end: that the parent have an honorable, pious, and chaste household. A wicked household is a great and widely spreading evil; it has deceived the holiest men and overthrown royal houses. Do you marvel that in the court of the holiest king and prophet Amnon commits incest and Absalom, stained with his brother’s murder, seeks his father’s throat? Cease to marvel: Joab, the slayer of two princes, held power. Ahithophel’s counsel was regarded as though it were the counsel of God—the counsel of the man who inflamed the son against his father’s bed and blood. A criminal little servant harms a son’s morals as much as a bad father does. For in the presence of any father whatsoever reverence and nature produce some shame at sin. Wicked Pseudoluses and Sosias, while they ennoble the sons of households with crimes, pursue their own advantage. As Theodosius was dying, nothing was higher among his wishes than to assign good ministers to his sons Arcadius and Honorius. You turn away a pestilential, leprous, or epileptic servant, for he would bring death and infamy upon the house and distribute contagion among his companions. Yet, softened by a friend’s recommendation or by compliance, you tolerate wicked ministers who will infect your sons with a foul plague. And what is most wretched, they will make them your enemies.
§ 4. Imitate the institution of the Persians: remove your sons from the sight of the household and the marketplace, even from your own and their mother’s sight if you must act amid the crowd. Harden yourself bravely here; conquer your affections; let the wisdom of a manly spirit overcome the tenderness of love. Persian sons lived apart from the household; Romans kept boyhood guarded at home and passed youth in war. Young men were immediately imbued with military service, so that by obeying they might become accustomed to command, and by following, to act as leaders. Pliny, book 8, Epistle 14, gives the reason. Tacitus, Annals 2: city youths overflowing with luxury are better kept in camps. The Persians did not admit sons into their sight before the fourth year; the Gauls, not until adulthood. But let him send the boy where he may advance in virtue, lest in his absence he encounter seducers, for corruptions are everywhere.
§ 5. Nevertheless, let him observe moderation in sending the boy away. Let him not send younger boys far away to travel or for a long time, but entrust them to nearby teachers, so that he may be able to learn of his son’s progress and may not receive him back corrupted by the morals of a foreign nation, forgetful of his paternal tongue, and contemptuous of the laws and customs of his own people. For a tender age drinks in all those things, but evils more quickly. A boy is educated more indulgently abroad when he is far away and absent for a long time, unless the greatest care is applied, and precisely the kind that a prudent father would apply. Furthermore, the travels of boys are useless, for they cannot observe the situation of towns, the advantages of rivers, the suitability of harbors, much less the morals, institutions, and laws of nations. Therefore that wandering does not serve prudence but harms talent and studies; from it most have brought back foreign vices, having forgotten the virtue of their fatherland.
§ 6. Let the parent imitate the Laconians: let education be severe and mixed with labors and adversities. Let the little boy have someone whom he reveres; let him have something whose denial pains him. Let him also at times be compelled to yield. For unless he is restrained by many bridles, since he lacks prudence he must necessarily be driven by very great and various desires, so that if you give him the reins, he turns out most wanton and obstinate. Indeed, he will put on a nature which no later discipline will shake off. Therefore let delights be taken away; let him feel reverence and fear. A father who indulges his son is a tyrant. Part of the cruelty of tyrants was to corrupt by luxury the sons of men whom they wished destroyed. Dionysius, tyrant of Sicily, when he could harm Dion in no other way, commanded his wife to marry another and his son to be so educated that before the years of puberty he was overwhelmed with wine, feasts, and prostitutes, to such a degree that he was allowed to be sober at no time. When the tyrant had been expelled, the father returned home; but when he attempted, by placing guards over him, to bring his son back to good conduct, he understood to his great grief how much force the first rudiments of education possessed. For the son, indignant that his accustomed pleasures were withdrawn, hurled himself from the highest part of the house and ended his life together with his delights. A prudent father will therefore preoccupy every path, and the whole state will apply itself to this end: that there be no access to vices. For after their poisons have poured themselves into the vital parts, either medicine is late or a dangerous medicine must be applied, because mild remedies yield to great evils. Hence disinheritances, prisons, custody, and at times hidden executions. The cause of these evils is often indulgence in education. What Aristotle pronounced in book 1 of the Ethics is most true:
Οὐ μικρὸν οὕτως ἢ οὕτως εὐθὺς ἐκ νέων ἐθίζεσθαι διαφέρει, ἀλλὰ πάμπολυ, μᾶλλον δὲ τὸ πᾶν.
It is not a small matter to become accustomed from tender years in this or that manner, but an exceedingly great one; indeed, the whole depends upon it. Therefore appear more austere and stern toward the son whom you especially love.
Those whom you shall establish to raise up the hope of your race, Bestow especial labor upon them even now, from tender years.
§ 7. Let discipline be seasoned with sweetness: let gentleness be joined to constant and even gravity, severity, and command, a gentleness that may make labors and exercises seem honorable and pleasing. I do not wish a father to be so severe that his son performs the labors of studies or other duties through fear alone. For the harshness of the one commanding renders odious things otherwise pleasing and suited to the disposition of young men. Therefore let severity be employed so that he is drawn back from vices, idleness, and expense; gentleness, so that he is led civilly and sweetly to honorable things. Let him always hope for the rewards of good deeds, and experience pardon and impunity for offenses as most difficult to obtain.
§ 8. Let the educator recognize the disposition of each. So great is the variety of different talents that, when one comes to particulars, diverse and almost contrary arts must be employed. Some are led to duty by threats; others, indignant, cast away the things upon which they had set their affection; others, stunned, take flight. A good disposition rises through praise; light talents swell; the proud become obstinate. Praise has harmed many.
But amid this variety of talents, many deceive many. Therefore the things I have said are entirely general. No disposition is so well born and so upright that the examples of parents and household do not corrupt it; none is such that it must not be constrained by severity and fostered by gentleness, because all have received seeds of the virtues implanted in their minds. In order that these may grow into fruits, they need not only seasonable sun and rain, but also winds and cold, so that they may be strengthened and put forth roots. Other matters concerning sobriety and the choosing of masters require their own treatment; for the present it is sufficient to have given these admonitions generally.